Change is an ever-present reality in our lives, yet we can never seem to accept it. We design elaborate schemes to stabilize favorable circumstances, only to be surprised when they fail. And yet, we try again. Why do we so obstinately refuse to accept that permanence in this life is a myth?
The watershed moment in our culture came in Ancient Greece, when the insights of one man, Heraclitus, were overshadowed by those of another: Plato.
Plato taught that our physical world is merely a shadow of a higher realm of ideal forms—perfect and unchanging. He believed that the changes we witness every day in people and things are just material objects moving toward or away from these ideal forms. The adoption of this belief instilled in Western thought a longing for a nebulous ideal called perfection and, with it, a deep-seated bias against change.
How different might life be if the thought of Heraclitus had been the foundation of our culture? The man who famously said, "Nothing endures except change." Would we be as obsessed with preserving things like success and beauty? Would we harbor the same disdain for aging and failure?
I’ve spent most of my life trying to become something else—striving for my own idealized form. And yet, I never feel like I’ve truly gotten anywhere. There were moments in my life when I thought, I’m happy right here, and it would be fine if things stayed this way forever. But inevitably, those moments fell apart too.
Now at 53, I just want to find a way to be happy with where my life is and who I am now. I’m no longer convinced that happiness is something down the road. If I can’t enjoy what I have here and now, I doubt I ever will.
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